The Joy of Helicopter Seeds & the Chagrin of Birds & the Bees

Samara Color 1470
Originally uploaded by splitcat.

Actor Crush of the Day: Hugh Jackman (very Kate & Leopold-ish; his Wolverine hairdo is stoopid-lookin, at least, for my tastes, but for Wolverine, it fits.)

I always welcome the arrival of helicopter seeds in late springtime. I remember my endless fascination with them as a child, and the wonder I felt and imagination I engaged in while viewing their spiraling flights.

I have been passing this delight down to my daughter, whom I KNEW would take supreme happiness in the discovery, explanation, and exploration of these springtime seeds.

One day about two weeks ago, I picked several up and let fly. I told her they were called helicopter seeds, because they spin about in a manner similar to the workings of a helicopter's blades, and that they glide towards the ground in their characteristic whirl in a way that seeds and the like generally do not.

I enjoyed her childish glee and wonder of discovery as she began to explore these natural wonders on her own!

(Pause for station identification; I will continue the story soon!)

Continued: Sorry it took me so long, I have many problems with consistency.

Later that day, I heard her playing outside with a friend she's made (finally!). I heard her telling Tamara to gather up some helicopter seeds and drop them, and Tamara asked, "Why do you call them helicopter seeds?" My daughter proceeded to matter-of-factly and authoritatively explain that they are called helicopter seeds because they spiral down to the ground, like helicopter blades. I listened for Tamara's reaction, and it was good! They proceeded to have alot of fun with these seeds, until Scott put up the Playhut 5x5x5 foot playhouse for them.

Tamara's mother was outside with them, keeping an eye out as she chatted on her cell phone. I can only wonder with chagrin what she must think after what happened next.

Shortly after engaging in play inside the playhouse, I heard Emily exclaim that she was going into labor; that it was time for the baby to come out. Can you imagine the look on my face??? I was like oh . . .. no . . . . .

You see, it's all my SIL Becky's fault, for having two recent babies these last couple years. Especially her youngest, Robin. Emily had all SORTS of questions about pregnancy and how babies are made, and come out, and such, because of Beck's pregnancy with Robin. She had been quite interested in the earlier pregnancy as well, but wasn't quite able to ask such pointed and detailed questions, as well as vaguer questions, but with a sense that I had of her that I had better answer with ENOUGH information to satisfy the questions (although, of course, there were lines of information I would not yet cross . . .) Emily had also, during Beck's recent pregnancy, one day exclaimed, after reading for the umpteenth time a book by Gail Gibbons on panda bears that she has, that Aunt Bea and Uncle Kitt had mated and that's how babies were made.

The look of astonishment on my face on that day must have been priceless, as well as the fact that I had to pick my jaw up off of the floor after a few moments of speechlessness . . . . You see, there is one sentence in the panda book, that says something like, and I paraphrase, "The female panda and the male panda mate to have babies."

My smart little girl had related THAT, to Beck's pregnancy. Talk about deductive reasoning (or is that inductive? I probably ought to look that up . . . .). Emily was six years old at the time . . . VERY very smart for her age, so I gave her answers that one might think would be more for an 8-9 year old. (And now, I'm just starting to move to the next level of slightly more specific with things, as, of course, she just keeps getting brighter; better from me than from kids at school.)

Anyway, THANKS Beck! Hee hee hee. Just wait til you have to 'splain it to your daughter. Fun times . . . .

Okay. So, my daughter was making yelling sounds, right after announcing it was time for the baby, and in about 5 seconds, the baby was "here" and she was taking care of it. Boy, if only it were that easy . . . I'd sure like an easy, or even regular, time, next time, please!!! I am not sure what Tamara thought of this, but I think she joined in. Emily came in and got two baby dolls and brought them out to the Playhut, and they proceeded to have babies again.

Oh . . . my . . . . gosh!!! I was SO chagrined!!! I listened VERY carefully to their play; there would be aspects of this that I would nip in the bud in a second. I carefully considered whether or not I should nip the little that was going on, in the bud, but I considered the following things:

• Little girls love playing mother, playing house, and learning about their roles as women in life. In fact, that's part of what growing up is about. For all that practically ALL mothers would be fine with their daughter playing mother to a doll, I suspect that most of them may not have let their daughter play on as I did. Now that I've had reason to think about it, that doesn't make alot of sense to me. If Emily is sophisticated (intellectually, in a way that is not necessarily socially or emotionally sophisticated, especially considering her high-functioning autism) enough to ask the questions she does, and figure out as much as she does on her own, then I feel it is ok for her to play in this generalized way about the issue.
• She is, after all, most likely going to go through pregnancy and delivery first-hand at some point in her life (I hope; she is VERY high-functioning autistic, so much so that there may just be some sensory and social differences with which she can learn to work with and around by the time she's a teenager. Then again, I do have cause to worry about this, even though it seems as though, I'm hoping, she may end up just fine . . . .), and I don't want to freak her out about it or make her think or feel that it is a negative thing. It is a positive thing, and a part of her biology, and possibly a future part of her life.
• That said, if she started acting out sex, or got too detailed, graphic, or did other play-acting that seemed too outrageous, too much, I would, of course, nip THAT in the bud and have a talk with her about how some things are not for public play.
• Some might say that about the little "labor and delivery" she did, but really, I am GLAD she is wondering about herself, in relation to this, and is working that out through play (in a very short, generalized, non-detailed way.) Some might still be having conniption fits over this, but I feel that too often, little girls are taught (often, through instances like this where someone "comes down on them" for something like this, and often unkindly/harshly) that their bodies, biological functions, life cycle issues, gender role issues (as dictated by biology and our religious beliefs; I will not let society, as little as I can do about it, I'll do as much as I can, I will not let society be her textbook for who she should be, as a girl, teenager, and woman. And, I can do much about it, although I can't isolate all that I'd wish to that I feel is negative in regards to women, that is taught by society), and other things. I will endeavor to non-judgementally have frank and open discussions with her about these issues, in non-shaming and accepting ways of any questions she might have, acceptance of the biology involved (that may sound obvious, but I still feel that, as women, we are in some ways still subliminally taught, by society, to be ashamed of many of our female bodily functions, organs, and such.), and ACCEPTING and NON-JUDGEMENTAL of her interest in and curiosity about such matters. She is a girl, and will grow to a woman.
• I can't believe it, but she's almost 8; puberty generally happens between 8-14, although 8 IS early. Still, I've gotta start thinking about it (I can't believe it!!!! My baby's growing up!)

I did have my own internal "conniption fit", as I tried to sort through the tangle of complicated and intense emotions I have, as a mother, about these issues and the very murky waters that can surround them. The very individual course that must be charted by each set of parents for their child(ren) in these matters. I think I'm comfortable with what I've related above, although I don't know Tamara's mother's feelings on the matter. I'm not sure if she heard at all, as she was on the cell phone.

I was VERY chagrined at the thought of, "Oh, what if Tamara starts playing this at home tonight, and they ask her where she learned that . . . . !" If they have a problem with it, I can discuss with Emily that this friend's mother would rather they didn't play that, but that Emily didn't do anything wrong; she just needs to do it alone, or with other friends. And hope that Emily doesn't get hurt by this.

Part of me was giggling a bit inside, though. I mean, my little girl comes up with the funniest things, sometimes. Sometimes outrageously funny, or funnily outrageous . . . . she just figures out so many things, that I couldn't stop her figuring them out if I tried!!!